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‘L-o-v-e’ Evolves

If you’ve been with your partner for a few years, you know that love evolves. It gets bumpy and sort of like the old ‘bumper cars’ (if you can remember those), we have to steer in a different direction if the other car doesn’t. How like life and love!

Years ago, before my second marriage, I prided myself on figuring out right away (like after a few dates) if a relation-ship (love that word, don’t you?) was going to make it or crash on rocky shores. Needless to say, most crashed–until I met the man who is now my second husband for over 36 years.

I’d like to say we stuck together like glue, but that’s not true. I was still pretty jumpy, so if things weren’t going well, I’d leave. I traveled the country for my consulting business so it was easy to do. No, I’m not proud of that, but I AM proud of the man who was always there when I came back, which I always did. Now we’re retired, and we live full-time together in love.

Lots of people end their marriages. In fact, a lot of people don’t even get married–although any type of separating after a committed relationship is tough, especially if there are children involved. (Oh my! I can see ‘love’ in that word ‘involved’! Can you?)

Here’s an idea to try if you want more love: For a number of years now, right after getting up in the morning, we face each other, join hands and say, ‘Together’ seven times and seal it with a KISS. It’s a daily reminder of what we want for that day and for our future. We’ve been married for over 36 years.

I learned something so powerful about LOVE that I put it into my memoir, titled ‘I Was A Yo-Yo Wife: Until I Learned THIS!’ I like to say that I learned how to save my second marriage in about TEN minutes because life taught me about looking inside myself FIRST before I blame my husband for something.


If you don’t have someone else to love, LOVE YOURSELF. Actually LOVE YOURSELF FIRST because that’s the key to a successful relation-ship. Sail on, lovebirds!

Vivian Probst

Linguist, Author, Lover of Words

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